Dividing Up Your Parental Duties
I want to pose a question to my readers. I will ask the question, elaborate and then ask the question again.
Do you divide up parental duties and, if so, how?
In my house we do sort of tend to “adopt” certain roles we feel we can contribute to the family. When it comes down to chores we simply get to it when we can. We both take out the trash, cook, clean, and do dishes. Sometimes I will go on a clothes washing spree, fold, and put away clothes. Other times I don’t want anything to do with clothes. So we take turns mostly on chores.
But there are other things that pertain to parenting than just chores. For instance, who puts the kids to bed? I somehow have adopted that roll. I get the kids teeth brushed and send them off to bed. I come up, tuck them each in, and kiss them goodnight. My wife hasn’t done this in 4 years.
What about reading to your kids? Do you both participate in this? Who writes the checks and controls the money? Who says what the kids can wear, and when it is ok to visit their friend?
Are these mutual decisions, divided up, or does one take over?
I thought this would be a great topic for discussion so…
Do you divide up parental duties and, if so, how?
Related Stories
POSTED IN: Parenting
10 opinions for Dividing Up Your Parental Duties
Jared
Feb 13, 2007 at 11:34 am
As far as parenting goes, we’ve really only divided the logistical side of things. I generally get our son ready in the mornings, and ready for bed at night. For a while now, we’ve both put him to bed; he insists that Mommy always be there.
Mike
Feb 13, 2007 at 2:28 pm
We both put the kids to bed and alternate who reads stories (but both stay in the room), but I normally do the bath/toothbursh routine since I’m not around for the morning routine ever during the week.
Almost everything else, from cooking, trash, cleaning, has been divided and subdivided into roles that emerged over the years. I vacuum, clean bathrooms, but BeAGoodMom cleans the kitchen, does most of the cooking. I take out the trash and get the oil changed on the cars, but she runs the checkbook.
Rory
Feb 13, 2007 at 7:39 pm
When it comes to cooking, that’s usually Kate. Everything else, we pretty much have a “whoever’s on hand” kind of approach.
The night-time duties are often left to me: Getting her into her ‘jamas; brushing the teeth; rocking her to sleep. At the moment, Paul Simon’s Graceland is a favourite.
Karen
Feb 13, 2007 at 11:24 pm
My husband usually gets one child ready in the morning and one child ready at night. Most of the other stuff is left to me. I bargain shop for all the clothes. He never ask where they came from. He knows I got a good deal on them. I take care of all the doctor’s appointments, medicines, and the kid’s necessities. I do the grocery shopping, laundry, and most of the housework. He does some of the housework. He takes care of the yard work during the summer and he takes care of the house repairs and some car repairs.
steve
Feb 14, 2007 at 10:16 am
Looks like you guys all pretty much share in the duties. There are a lot of things I don’t like to do that my wife likes to do and vice versa so we sort of fall into those roles. Can you guys imagine living over 100 years ago where duties were a lot more strict and you stuck to your own gender role. Men hardly ever cooked then. Women always stayed home with the kids.
Today my wife and I both move and stack wood and cook and vacuum.
Rory
Feb 14, 2007 at 10:57 am
Certainly must account for the uptight nature of us Brits. All that Victorian upbringing.
Mind you, is today much better, in a different kind of way? Even in a small town like mine the night streets are full of disaffected youths being generally scary. Have things swung too far the other way as a reaction to the way it was 100 years ago?
Phil
Feb 14, 2007 at 3:27 pm
I do almost everything, but my wife will step in to give me a break.
However, here are the things that I do pretty much exclusively:
Fold and put away clothes
Clean the cat litterbox
Shop for groceries
Organize and clean the kids’ rooms
Mow the lawn
Plan trips, picnics, hikes, etc.
Finances
Computer-related things
I don’t mind doing all of this, although sometimes I wish my wife would worry about the finances a little more. And fold clothes (because that’s my least favorite activity).
Oh, I also do all of the household projects, like the landscaping, closet shelves, new deck, repairing the squeaky floor, etc.
Long Island Dad
Feb 15, 2007 at 3:46 pm
Because of my wife’s schedule the only household tasks she does is laundry and finances. I do everything else… that’s the deal! When it comes to the kids she mostly “takes care” of them on her days off. It’s her time with them. Also gives me a chance to catch up on things I can’t do when she’s not there. Before kids, we split everything equally. Nothing was one or the others. That worked great until the little people started arriving.
Anthony Kiedis
Jan 29, 2008 at 3:09 am
Anthony Kiedis…
Nice Post… do tou know what is the first?…
Anthony Kiedis
Feb 8, 2008 at 7:35 am
Anthony Kiedis…
I could have not said it better myself….
Have an opinion? Leave a comment: